My Mother’s Dog

To the tune of Take me out to the Ballgame

Take me out to the Front Yard
Take me out to the lawn
Let me stick my nose into the grass
I don’t care if we ever go in
Let me walk all over the garden
Bark and run at the cars
Cos’ it’s One. Two. Blessed relief in the Ol’ front yard


They’ve found three planets in the inhabitable zone around a dwarf star ~40 light years away.

They’ve reason to believe that liquid water is also present.


Technomage (Sorcerer Sorcerous Origin)

I’ve done a homebrew sub-class for Dragonlance and a PC sub-race for Dark Sun.

Time for something a bit off the wall: Spelljammer.


Technomage Sorcerers gain their powers from being infused with alien technology so advanced as to be indistinguishable from arcane magic.

At 1st level, you gain the following benefits:

  • Your proficiency bonus is doubled on all Intelligence checks and skills with which you are proficient.
  • You know the shocking grasp cantrip.
  • You have proficiency with light armor and shields.

At 6th level, whenever you take damage, you can use your reaction to teleport up to 60 feet away to an unoccupied space that you can see.
Once you use this feature, you cannot use it again until after you finish a short or long rest.
At 18th level, you can use this feature one additional time between a short or long rest.

At 6th level, you can cast the spell arcane eye on your turn as though it were a 3rd level sorcerer spell.
Additionally, whenever you cast a spell or cantrip that deals force or lightning damage, you can add your Charisma modifier as a bonus to one damage roll.

At 14th level, you can use a bonus action on your turn to become invisible.
If you make an attack or cast a spell, the invisibility is suspended until the start of your next turn.
You can dismiss the invisibility on any of your subsequent turns as a bonus action.

At 18th level, your body is completely assimilated by the alien technology that you are bonded to.
You gain resistance to bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing damage from nonmagical weapons, and you cannot be grappled or restrained.

Coolest piece of art ever

I’ve no clue who created this, but good lord, it’s amazing


Mad Max meets Lord of the Rings.

Wind Elf PC Race

If the Oath of the Dragon was influenced by the Dragonlance D&D Setting, the Wind Elf is influenced by the Dark Sun D&D Setting.

It may not be as “good” as the official Wood Elf, but I think it fits Dark Sun better, at least thematically.

Ability Score Increase. Your Intelligence score increases by 1.
Elf Weapon Training. You have proficiency with the scimitar, shortbow, and longbow.
Fleet of Foot. Your base walking speed increases to 35 feet.
Voice in the Wind. You know the message cantrip, and can cast it without material components.
At 5th level, the range increases to 360 feet, and if you are familiar with the target then nothing can block the cantrip except magical silence, 20 feet of stone, or 1 foot of lead.

Oath of the Dragon (5e Paladin Sacred Oath)

Note: This homebrew sub-class was primarily influenced by:

  • the film How to Train Your Dragon
  • internet research into Skyrim
  • the anime/manga Yona of the Dawn
  • the Dragonlance D&D setting
  • The Ringwraiths from the Lord of the Rings film trilogy
  • the Dragoon PC class from the Final Fantasy franchise

Paladins that follow the Oath of the Dragon–sometimes called dragoons or dragon riders–are those who have pledged their loyalty in service to a powerful chromatic or metallic dragon.

Bring me Treasure. A percentage of whatever treasure you obtain from each adventure is to be given back to your dragon master.
My Word is Law. Should your dragon master give you a command or decree, you must obey it.
My Teeth and Claws. You are to conquer and/or destroy the enemies of your dragon master.

3rd —- Feather Fall, Hunter’s Mark
5th —- Hold Person, Scorching Ray*
9th —- Bestow Curse, Haste
13th —- Freedom of Movement, Polymorph
17th —- Dominate Person, Hold Monster

*when you cast this spell, the damage is of the type associated with your dragon master

When you take this oath at 3rd level, you can speak, read, and write Draconic.
Furthermore, you must choose the species of the dragon who will become your master.
The species of your dragon master is associated with a particular damage type:
Black —— Acid
Blue ——- Lightning
Brass —– Fire
Bronze — Lightning
Copper — Acid
Gold —— Fire
Green —- Poison
Red ——- Fire
Silver —– Cold
White —– Cold

When you take this oath at 3rd level, you gain the following Channel Divinity options:
Draconic Presence. As a bonus action, you give vent to a primal roar that frightens your enemies.
Each hostile creature within 30 feet of you must make a Wisdom saving throw or be frightened of you until the end of your next turn.
Draconic Savagery. As a bonus action, you give vent to a primal roar that increases your fighting spirit.
For 1 minute, you deal extra damage equal to your Charisma modifier on a hit. The extra damage is of the type associated with your dragon master.

At 7th level, your dragon master bequeaths to you one of its own offspring to serve you as a fully trained mount both in and out of combat.
The following rules apply to your draconic steed:

  • It is of Young age and is the same species as your dragon master.
  • It has proficiency in the Athletics, Intimidation, Perception, and Survival skills
  • It can make only one attack on your turn. It cannot use a multiattack feature if it normally has one.
  • Whenever you gain a level in the paladin class, it gains one additional hit dice.
  • It has a proficiency bonus of +3 (unless it is a Blue, Gold, Red, or Silver dragon, in which case it has a proficiency bonus of +4).
  • If you advance to a 9th, 13th, and 17th level paladin, the proficiency bonus of your draconic steed increases by +1 each time.
  • Whenever you gain the Ability Score Improvement class feature, your draconic steed can improve one of its ability scores of your choice by 2, or two of its ability scores of your choice by 1. As normal, your draconic steed cannot increase an ability score above 20 using this method.
  • Your draconic steed acts on your turn, and has an instinctual bond that allows the two of you to fight as a seamless unit.

While mounted on your draconic steed, you gain the following benefits:

  • You can make any spell you cast that targets only yourself also target your steed.
  • You have resistance to the damage type associated with your dragon master.
  • Due to the bond between you and your draconic steed, you do not need to make any Handle Animal check to control it unless it is frightened.

Should your draconic steed be killed, you can perform an ancient ritual to resurrect it over the course of 24 hours. After the ritual is completed, your steed returns to life and reappears in an unoccupied space within 30 feet of yourself.

At 15th level, when either you or your draconic steed fails a saving throw, you can choose to turn that failure into a success
You can use this feature once, and regain the ability to do so again after you finish a short or long rest.

At 20th level, you can use your action to give vent to a primal roar that both revitalizes your allies and partially transforms you.
For 1 hour, you gain the following benefits:

  • You and your allies within 30 feet of you regain 10 hit points at the start of each of your turns.
  • You and your allies within 30 feet of you have immunity to the damage type associated with your dragon master.
  • Your fingernails transform into the talons of a dragon, and you can use them as a natural weapon with a melee reach of 5 feet. You have proficiency and advantage on all attack rolls with these talons, and deal a base damage of 3d8 slashing + your Strength modifier on a hit.
  • Your talons are considered magical weapons for the purposes of damage resistance.

Once you use this feature, you can’t use it again until after you finish a long rest.

Random Thoughts, Rogue One

This was a good movie, not as good as the Force Awakens (there might never be a movie as good as Episode 7), but still very good in its own right.

Episode 7 was about the distillation and contrast between good and evil.  It was about how a freedom fighter could show compassion to one of his enemies, and let that man mourn the death of his friend.  In turn, that soldier would defect, and rescue the freedom fighter from certain death.  The soldier would then crash land and find a girl and a droid with the hope of the galaxy inside it.  A hope that the soldier was almost certainly taught to fear beyond all else.  The girl would treat the soldier like a living person, and he would treat her with respect and concern, something no one had ever done to either of them.  The girl is later captured, and after delivering the droid to the resistance, the soldier risks everything to rescue the girl, suffering horrific injuries at the hands of an evil man.  The girl then stands against the evil man and his cruelties, ultimately driving him back and rescuing the soldier, just as the soldier once rescued the freedom fighter.


in Rogue One, the importance of the Jedi is emphasized, simply by their absence.

In Return of the Jedi, it isn’t until the moment that Luke picks up his light saber and battles Vader that things actually turn in favor of the rebellion.  In Rogue One, it isn’t until Mon Mothma and Bail Organa mention bringing Obi-Wan out of hiding that anything really goes right for the alliance.

Without Luke Skywalker as a spiritual champion for what the Rebellion is to believe in, the rebellion leadership is fractured.  Saul Gerrera is a paranoid loon, Admiral Raddus (possibly Ackbar’s superior, think Winston Churchill with a squid-head) continues the fine tradition of mon calamari being lovable warmongering masters of both strategy and stating the obvious, leaving Mon Mothma and Bail Organa as the only sane people in the building.

without the Force, you do not have love.  The best example of this is with the character of Chirrut, a blind man who believes in the force but is not a Jedi himself.  He can feel the force, but cannot wield it, and he basically serves as the padre for the rogue one commando unit.  Before he shows up, the rebellion fights for itself and are little more than thugs.  After he shows up, the rebellion begins to fight for the betterment of others and truly becomes heroic.

The biggest point emphasizing how important the Jedi are for the Galaxy is when the plans have been beamed aboard the rebel flagship.  The main characters of the film have all been killed, the Death Star schematics downloaded onto a data disk, and Darth Vader shows up.  Without the Jedi to stand between the Sith and the people of the Galaxy, there is nothing anyone can really do against the dark side except run, but even that is only temporary.  There is a moment when a rebel soldier has the plans in his hands, but the door is only an inch or so open, he can’t get through, and Vader is RIGHT THERE.  None of the other rebel soldiers are able to slow Darth Vader down in the slightest and they know it. Finally, desperately, his friends behind him being cut down like mere blades of grass, the soldier just shoves the plans through the door at the guy on the other side, who grabs them and takes off running.  An instant later, the soldier is impaled on Vader’s light saber, the door is ripped off its hinges, and Leia’s blockade runner escapes in the nick of time.

At the beginning of A New Hope, ALL of the rebellion’s sacrifices in Rogue One have been in vain.  ALL OF THEM.  It is not until Luke Skywalker listens to C-3PO and suggests that Uncle Owen buy R2-D2 that the sacrifices of the Erso family are proven not to be in vain.

because he goes with Obi-Wan, because he decides to rescue Leia, and because he decides to fly into battle against the Death Star and is the one who destroys that hateful machine, Luke Skywalker is the one who validates the action of the Rogue One commando unit.

Galen, the hostage scientist unable to escape, but determined to hurt the empire in the biggest way he can: by building the flaw in the Death Star.

Jyn, the scientist’s daughter, who sacrifices everything to retrieve the Death Star schematics.

Kassian, the rebel scout who has not experienced a day without violence since he was six years old.

K-2SO, a reprogrammed Imperial Strategy Droid, who goes out of his way to try and keep Kasian safe.  He clearly loves Kassian, even though he never once says so.

Bodhi, an imperial cargo pilot and glorified UPS driver, who is the one that first informs the rebellion of the Death Star’s existence.

Chirrut and Baze, two ordinary men that once served as gatekeepers for a Jedi temple on the planet of Jedha.

The Force was with them, and they are one with the Force.

Worst Birthday in years

I’m sick.  Sick as a dog.

Arrowverse Invasion Crossover part 2

I liked this episode.  I liked it a lot.

The Dominators. Diggle’s continued sensitivity to super-speed travel (it still makes him throw up). Thea positively JUMPING at the chance to fight aliens. Barry knowing he isn’t leader material but having it thrust upon him anyway. Barry subsequently fumbling for words and Oliver directing him on what to say. Iris finding out Oliver is Arrow. Iris making Barry exceedingly uncomfortable with her comments about Oliver’s hotness. Oliver admitting that if he had super speed he would absolutely go back in time and try to save his father. Heatwave’s personality. Jax apologizing to Supergirl for Heatwave’s personality. Sara having a crush on Supergirl. Supergirl being an absolute POWERHOUSE capable of taking on everyone else simultaneously and wiping the floor with the lot of them. Arrow requesting a five minute break from getting his ass handed to him repeatedly. Sara and Oliver together again (oh, how I miss Arrow season 2). Wally saving Flash and Arrow. The warehouse where they all come together being the Hall of Justice . . .

In the words of Felicity: Best. Team-Up. Ever!

a second Gnome sub-race

In the 5e Player’s Handbook, gnomes get a +2 to Intelligence, and a +1 to either Dexterity or Constitution.
That’s one mental stat, and two physical stats. Kind of like an opposite of the Elf, which has a +2 to Dexterity, and a +1 to either Intelligence, Wisdom, or Charisma.
To provide an additional sub-race that fills out the gnome’s missing +1 physical stat (Strength), while also coming up with a really cool concept/backstory inspired by Norse mythology, I give you the Rune Gnome.
I think like these guys better than the Starblast Gnomes from my previous post

Every humanoid that can use the power of speech to cast magic spells owes a debt of gratitude to the Rune Gnomes, who stole the knowledge of how to draw symbols and then use them to cast magic from the ancient Giants, tattooing the symbols upon their very own skin so as not to forget what each one meant.
Ability Score Increase. Due to the magical energies contained within the runes imprinted upon their bodies, Rune Gnomes have a greater on-average physical strength than other gnomes. Your Strength score increases by 1.
Transfer Rune. As an action, you can touch either a wall, the floor, or a handheld object in your possession and transfer one rune from yourself onto it. At the end of your turn, each creature within 10 feet of the rune must make a Dexterity saving throw (DC 8 + your Intelligence modifier + your Proficiency bonus), taking 2d6 Force damage on a failure, or half as much on a success. The rune magically reappears on your body at the start of your next turn.
At 6th, 11th, and 16th level, the damage increases by 1d6, to a maximum of 5d6 at 16th level.
Once you use this trait, you cannot use it again until after you finish a short or long rest.